In my final weeks of living here in Italy, I have started to look back on the past few years of my life.
I am trying to remember who I was when I first came over to this country, because I know without a doubt that I am no longer the same. I feel like my life has changed in so many ways in so little time. I seriously cannot believe our time here is up. Where do I even begin???
August 1, 2011 I said goodbye to my family and friends and to my beloved America. I got on a plane and went straight to Italy. I had waited 6 whole months to get to Richard and I was so anxious to finally be starting our new life together. We got married the December before and then he left for Airborne School then in March left for Italy. We never got a real wedding, honeymoon, nothing, so were both ready to actually feel married!
Back at that point in my life I was a very nervous, scared, excited 20 year old girl who just left home for the first time to be with her husband in a totally different part of the world. And then my world came to a screaming hault when I miscarried our first baby in October. I would decribed the Me back then as depressed. I felt like I failed at life in all honesty. I couln't do what a woman was suppose to be able to do so easily. And when I thought things couldn't get any worse, I miscarried our second baby in December. I can't tell you the pain I felt in my heart. It was truly the hardest time in my entire life. I had no family around and the so called friends I had made were just depressing to even be around because all they did was talk about others behind their backs. Made me wonder what they were saying about me behing my back. I had not found a church to go to yet and I felt like my spiritual tank was way past empty. I was honestly angry at God. I didn't know why He allowed this to happen. What did I do that I was deserving of this? I was so bitter. I hate who I was looking back now...
Then the new year came and I wanted to start a new chapter in my life. I wanted to reset everything. I wanted to feel like myself again. One day I was at the post office and I saw a flyer about the kick off for PWOC (Protestant Women of the Chapel). I decided I should go just to see what it was all about. Well I went and I must say that was the BEST decision I have EVER made. Not only was I getting into a group of ladies to study God's word, but I have also gained some really good friends while doing so. My first study was called Hope for the Homefront. It was led by one awesome lady. The study was about how having faith gives us hope while our husbands are deployed. With deployment only months away I figured that was the best study for me at the time. I am so thankful that I chose that study because all my really close friends that I have were in that study as well and that is where our friendship started and it just went from there!
My life had done a complete 180! I was back to being myself again! I was so happy and I had Jesus back in my life and I had friends to talk to and to keep me accountable.
Then July came and a piece of my heart left my side. Richard left for Afghanistan for a 9 month deployment. Because of the Bible study class, I can honestly say that I was ok with him leaving. I knew that this was all part of being an Army wife and that God was going to keep him safe and sound. I was prepared for everything as far as my husband not being there for a long time and no communication, etc. etc. But I was not howerever prepared for the phonecall I got a few weeks after he left. I was standing at the checkout counter in the PX and I answered my phone. A voice on the other line said, "If you have not been notified by casualty services, this does not have to do with your husband, but a member of Chosen company was KIA...." that's all I remember the voice saying. Someone in my husband's company was killed. Every guy that I knew in the company went through my mind. These guys are all like brothers. And because I am married to one of them, they are like my brothers as well. I started crying and praying for whoever it was and for their family back home. That was a hard time in the deployment and I hate to say that it happened once more not too much longer after that. I was not prepared for one of my husband's friends to get killed, but it just taught me that I can never be fully prepared like I think I am. The Me at that point was just thankful to have my husband alive.
Not long after that, I went home to the beautiful state of Georgia. I was thrilled to be home with my family and friends, though I missed my "Italy friends" so much while I was home. Then October came and I got on another plane to Jamaica to go on a week long mission trip! It was the most amazing adventure ever!! I met some awesome women and made some life long friends and got to show the love of Jesus to sweet babies in an orphanage. I was on a Jesus high!!
I spent the holidays at home and loved every minute of it except the fact that my husband was missing from the picture. Weeks went by and January came. Another new year started and a year that I was so looking forward to! 2013 was one year that I knew was going to be EPIC and boy was I right!!!
January & February went by so slow seemed like but then came...
I spent the holidays at home and loved every minute of it except the fact that my husband was missing from the picture. Weeks went by and January came. Another new year started and a year that I was so looking forward to! 2013 was one year that I knew was going to be EPIC and boy was I right!!!
January & February went by so slow seemed like but then came...
March 11th, 2013. A day that I think I was more excited about than my wedding day. That day I got to welcome home my soldier from deployment. It was a very amazing day!! 8+ months without my husband was long enough!
Then about 3 weeks later, I took a test and when two tiny pink lines appeared like magic, my world was even more exciting! We were pregnant. (Yes I said WE! Don't Judge!) I was thrilled about having a baby. I was terrified, but still very happy. I felt different about this one. It felt right. I prayed everyday that God would just be with the baby and I and keep us safe and healthy. And He did. I loved being pregnant and feeling her sweet kicks in my belly. At 39 weeks and 4 days, Ivy Victoria came into this world. She is perfect in every way possible. She is now 15 weeks old! I can't believe how time has slipped away from us that fast.
A few weeks is all we have left in Italy. It's a very bittersweet feeling.
I won't miss much about living here but the thing I will miss more than anything are the friends that I have made. I really only have a handful of good friends back home so the ones I have made here are really special to me. I hope we all keep in touch as often as possible.
Now that Richard is back home from Germany, we will be starting the process of moving back to the US. We are extremely excited and anxious to see what God has in store for us. We plan on staying in Georgia for about a month before we actually make North Carolina our new home. I'm not too sure how I would describe the Me now. I have matured in many ways and gained so much in the past 3 years. I don't regret anything. I know everything is according to a huge plan by God. He knows best.
May these next few weeks go by just as fast as they should. America, I will see you soon.
XO,
Meg
Then about 3 weeks later, I took a test and when two tiny pink lines appeared like magic, my world was even more exciting! We were pregnant. (Yes I said WE! Don't Judge!) I was thrilled about having a baby. I was terrified, but still very happy. I felt different about this one. It felt right. I prayed everyday that God would just be with the baby and I and keep us safe and healthy. And He did. I loved being pregnant and feeling her sweet kicks in my belly. At 39 weeks and 4 days, Ivy Victoria came into this world. She is perfect in every way possible. She is now 15 weeks old! I can't believe how time has slipped away from us that fast.
A few weeks is all we have left in Italy. It's a very bittersweet feeling.
I won't miss much about living here but the thing I will miss more than anything are the friends that I have made. I really only have a handful of good friends back home so the ones I have made here are really special to me. I hope we all keep in touch as often as possible.
Now that Richard is back home from Germany, we will be starting the process of moving back to the US. We are extremely excited and anxious to see what God has in store for us. We plan on staying in Georgia for about a month before we actually make North Carolina our new home. I'm not too sure how I would describe the Me now. I have matured in many ways and gained so much in the past 3 years. I don't regret anything. I know everything is according to a huge plan by God. He knows best.
May these next few weeks go by just as fast as they should. America, I will see you soon.
XO,
Meg
